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A New National Affluence Index....... :-)

You know affluence in the country is up when....... 1. You see grown ups wearing designer shorts in important public places..... 2. There are at least 3 houses in your neighbourhood that have eitherexteriors painted with Lavender or bright green or very dark yellow. 3. People own cars with seating capacity twice that of number ofmembers in their house 3a. People have a driver even for their 800 cc car. 3b. People have 2 kids and put their names in italics on the backglassof their cars! 4. People drive their cars to holiday destinations that are even 1500 km away. 4a. But..... take a flight for destinations that are just 300 km away. 5. The per capita consumption of country liquor drops in favour of Rumand eventually Rum consumption drops in favour of Beer. 5a. The per capita consumption of vegetables drops in favour of fish and eggs and in time the consumption of fish and eggs drops in favourof chicken (broiled!). 5b. The per capita consumption of til oil goes up and is soon replaced by vanaspati+ghee as the oil of choice and eventually by vegetable oils and ultimately by rice bran oil!! 5c. You can mail order "hyderabadi mutton biriyani" or Hilsa from anywhere in the country!! Or pick it up fresh at the right airports.:-) 5d. The average body weight of people goes up up and up over one toone and a half generations and then starts to plateau and eventually starts to come down as people start to think "being lean and muscular"is hip. (Starting a health club or investing in one is a good optionat this inflexion point!!) 6. People spend more each month for Spa treatments (or ayurvedic massage) than even food! 7. You have barbers flying Business class across the country to give haircuts (to women). 8. You have 100s of women queuing up for a 900-rupee haircuts (fm barbers mentioned in item no. 7 above!!) 9. You have Malls in movie theatres and vice versa. 10. Toilets in public places reinvent themselves and start to look like parlours with Italian marbles and hip plumbing. 11. Your weekly picnic is to the movie theatres where you eat more (junk!) food than all 3 meals put together 'cos movie theatres are selling u an experience not just a movie. 12. You had a fight that morning with the "thela gaadi tarkaari wala"for 50 paise but gladly pay Rs. 63.50 for a small popcorn or a Veg puff at the movies! 13. Orthodontics becomes a real career option. 13a. Being a Pedicurist becomes a real career option. 13b. You laugh at all your Doctor friends who bugged you in the past for not getting into a regular medical college and becoming only a Dentist 'cos you are making more money and working better hours than them. 14. You have at least 3 toothbrushes - one for each time of the day and a different toothpaste to go with it. 15. You spend more money for the earphones than the music system itself. 16. You buy a 200 Grand home theatre system so that you can hook up all the various gadgets including your TV that you watch only news on in any case. 17. Only the service technician knows how to operate all the features on the above system. You learn only to turn it ON or off and how to play with the volume control!! 18. You paid a fortune for the membership to the local Gym that you seldom use but only flaunt the card to your friends. 19. Your paperwala delivers papers on the latest " lifestyle"motorbike and is listening to his iPod to mitigate the monotony of delivering the daily morning paper. 20. The youngest member of your staff has a mobile that is 3 times hismonthly salary. 21. You find people wearing sneakers below their Dhotis or lungis. 22. You spent more money on your sunglasses or prescription glasses than what you spent on your entire wardrobe last year. 23. There are more opticians than eye doctors in your neighbourhood. 24. You go to the Doctor even for your hangover. 24a. And he prescribes at least 4 tablets to be taken 3 times a dayfor 5 days that includes protein supplements and two types of multi-vitamins in addition to the usual placebo. 25. You spend a fortune on Platinum jewellery and keep reminding all your friends at the party that it is not silver!! (Works with diamonds and cubic zirconia as well!!) Wish economists start to look seriously at these indices as well inaddition to their drab commonplace ones. LOLOL....

Comments

  1. Sriraman RanganathanTuesday, October 20, 2009 12:59:00 PM

    Hehe....nice one..

    ReplyDelete
  2. PathySunday, January 24, 2010 4:05:00 PM

    Corollary to 12..You pay Rs 100 for the 63.50 for Popcorn. You get Rs 35 and a toffee without asking for (for the Rs 1.50 that the shop keep owes you), and you don't whine..

    ReplyDelete
  3. ChariSunday, September 10, 2017 10:44:00 AM

    Interesting sir

    ReplyDelete

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